Barn Boots

I can finally walk past these boots without welling up, getting snotty nosed, and feeling that heavy thud in my chest. They wait in the garage next to my Muck Boots. Family and neighbors would silently chuckle when we saw Smitty in his cut offs and these boots making his way to the barn, making repairs, or hauling manure.
I sort of understand the symbolism here and am reminded of Kennedy's funeral. We old timers remember the feisty black horse in the procession - the empty saddle with the boots hung backwards. It's sort of like that.......
I hope that this doesn't sound too maudlin but writing is so theraputic for me that I can now probably put them in the trash.

Simplifly, Simplify

Don't you think this is just too lovely? I'm going to use these colors the next time I get out my dye pots.
I'm on a really big "cleaning, purging, simplify my life" binge. My son said that he would take the aquarium back to Pennsylvania the next time he comes home. The neighbor across the street's daughter came and took the two fish that I had left. Last winter the tank heater got totally out of control and I poached all but those two. They must be hearty little guys and will be in a nice home.


This was my tank. It took several, as in probably 30 trips to the sink to empty the yucky water

And then I washed all the stones as I removed them. You're welcome, Rob.

The glass tank is sitting outside but I think that I better not let the sun dry it out or it may leak. You can imagine me getting it down the stairs and out the doors by myself. Cassie and Max tried to help....
My next project is to paint my bedroom. I already bought the paint.

I'll bet a therapist would have a field day with me. Do all widows feel this urge to clean up their past life? What's with it? I feel the urge to not only clean and pitch things, but also to do physical stuff. I wonder if there is some energy in me that needs to be released????

My bestest friends

My animal friends bring me unlimited joy. Throw on a granddaughter for absolute bliss. This is Elizabeth resting on dear, kind Cassie with little Max looking on. This Golden Retriever and Shetland Sheep Dog (Sheltie) are my best friends and constant companions.
They have been anxious and worried for the last six weeks but seem to be settling back to normalcy now. I am taking my cues from them.

Good bye to some dear friends

With Smitty gone, my morning barn chores went from taking 1 hour to 3 hours. I have found really good homes for some of my 4 legged friends. These three alpacas, brown Luke, gray Boris, and black Berringer, have gone to a 4-H family in Northern Michigan. I know that they are getting all the attention and love that they need.

A really lovely 4-H family in Western Michigan has the sheep: 1 ram, 2 wethers, a ewe lamb, and 4 ewes. They are a delightful family who already have a couple BabyDolls and will take some to the fair.

♥

The hardest friend that I said good bye to was little Haflinger Fiona. Smitty bought her last year as a 4 year old with aspirations of driving her. She spent two weeks with a trainer this summer and Smitty went up and drove her twice. She came home the weekend before we got his diagnosis.

My dear friend, Harmony and her two girls, Chelsea and Caleigh, have her to work with.

I still have 4 horses and 16 alpacas greeting me every morning. I can't imagine a life without animals.

I didn't realize how hard this post would be to write. ........ Bear with me, friends, you are all part of my therapy, I guess.

Alpacas and Llamas

Yesterday Beth, her son, John, and I went to Lansing to the LlamaFest which is a show for llamas, but they were also showing a few alpacas. There were some vendors there selling products. We visited a while with my dear friend, Kathy. She is making some very stylish hats and purses from alpaca fiber.

Today it occurred to me that many people confuse alpacas and llamas. Until yesterday, I would just say that llamas are much bigger - sometimes up to 500 pounds. But folks are breeding miniature llamas now which are in the same 150 to 200 pound range of alpacas. Probably the best way to tell them apart is the shape of their ears. You can see by the picture above that Gunny's ears are erect and sort of a spear shape, but the llama below and on the left has ears that tip in toward each other.


They are similar in many ways. Both are members of the camelid family.

Their gestation is about 11 months and they have similar life spans. Both llamas and alpacas are induced ovulators which means they can be bred just about any time. Most folks think that alpacas and llamas originated in South America, but studies have shown that these camelid were originally from North America and migrated south.

It's a stretch of my imagination to realize that these cuddly creatures are family members of the camels.

I

















I haven't posted here in over a month because my world has pretty much turned upside down. On July 9, my husband was diagnosed with colon cancer which had progressed to his liver. Six weeks were spent having colonoscopies, CTs, MRIs, transfusions, IVs, and hospital stays. Finally on August 13th, he called at 7 a.m. from the hospital and said that he had enough and just wanted to come home. I called Dr. Stefanek at his home and asked if he would discharge Smitty when he went in to do his morning rounds. By the time I got there at 9, Doc had made all the arrangements and had Hospice folks ready to help me out.
Smitty died on August 21st, a week and a day after he came home.
My son from Pennsylvania was here the whole time and he and I were bedside when Smitty passed over. One daughter, Terre, was living here. The other daughter, Nikki, lives over an hour away but managed to get home frequently. Hospice was incredible and I wonder how folks could ever handle the ordeal without them. Doctor Stefanek would drop in to comfort not only Smitty, but us. And my friend, Beth, was my stability and rock. In her nonintrusive way, she was alway here checking on me. Damn! Friends are Great!
The funeral was yesterday and I'm just starting to reflect on the kindness and love that has poured from friends and even folks that I hardly know. The church was packed, we have a mountain of cards, the freezer is stuffed with casseroles, my frig is jammed with meats, cheezes and salads.
We established a scholarship/memorial fund with the high school where he was principal and even though we haven't actually counted, it looks like a few thousand will be given to a deserving student.
I hope that this post hasn't been depressing or morbid. Life is Good and death is a natural part of it. Although at moments I have periods of overwhelming sadness, I am ready to resume my place in this world with my family, animals, and friends.

Alpaca Breeding 101 / 'Paca Porno

I think that Beth and I helped Lars (Polaris) do a successful breeding with Lady Belita today. Someone told me that they watched alpaca or llama breeding on the "Dirtiest Jobs" show. I don't know why it would be considered dirty, it's not like we got spit on, or kicked, or anything like that.
First of all, if the female is ready to be bred, she will cush, like white Ariana is doing in this first picture. If she is already bred, or has a headache ☺, or something, she will spit, run away, maybe kick, or like Belita - do a growling, warning thing. Almost anything to let the male know that she is not receptive.
Belita did none of these things, but just stood there so Beth and I did a little "one, two, three, slide her front feet back" and down she went.
Now you need to know that this was Lars's second breeding attempt. He's our homegrown herdsire and only 2 and 1/2 years old.
My role was something like this "No, Lars, not the head, nope, not her side either, yep, back there, no, no, don't slide back, good boy, good boy, opps, get up there."
Beth is on her knees holding Belita's tail out of the way (tail is covered with a sock, don't want Lars getting a fiber burn), and observing and reporting to me any connections being made.
And SUCCESS! We had about a 20 minute breeding.


We will probably have our vet do an ultrasound and/or a progesterone test in a month to be sure that she's pregnant. If not, we will try again in the fall. Alpaca gestation is 11 months and we try to plan births to avoid high heat and extreme cold.
This is our handsome herd sire, Polaris, on the left. He is a very gentle guy with lovely conformation and fleece. We are hoping he has it figured out so that Beth and I don't have to be so actively involved. Sometimes we get to giggling thinking about what we would look like if someone walked into the barn.